The Enforcer once told us in a faculty meeting, when he was an Assistant Principal, that his job pretty much involved sitting behind a desk and having kids lie to him all day.
I feel his pain.
I had this little sixth grade girl, truly a piece of work, who was with me for two days due to her really insulting and rude behavior to her teachers. (Lovely). Every morning I do a brief orientation about what it's like in ISS, expectations, etc., Like most sixth graders, Little Rude One didn't really believe me when I said that all work had to be finished before they could be exited from ISS. I swear I only say this a 100 times a day, but some kids Just Don't Get It. A lot of kids are Shocked - Shocked! - when I actually do something I say I'm going to do.
In any case, Little Rude One turned in her social studies assignment with Nothing Attached. Seriously. Nothing. I called her up to my desk to find out where her work was.
"So, it says here that you should have the Egypt worksheet you got from your teacher yesterday for homework," I say. "Where is it?"
"It's at home," she says. Considering it was given to her to take home by her teacher the day before, that's a possibility, so I didn't pursue it.
"Okay, so below that it says you are supposed to read pages 302 through 320. Did you do that?" I ask knowing full well she didn't'.
"Yes, I did!" she boldly proclaimed.
"Okay, so on pages 320 and 321, you're supposed to do questions 1-10 on notebook paper. Where is this?"
"It's at home!" she chirps.
"Really?" I ask. Because she just got this assignment This Very Morning.
"Yes, it's at home!" She says again.
"So, I'm wondering how it could be at home, when you didn't even get this assignment until this morning, and as far as I can tell, you have been in this room with me all day."
"It's at home!" she again insisted.
"So, what you're saying, is that you got this assignment this morning, and somehow managed to teleport yourself back to your house where you completed it and left it?" I asked her.
At this point, I was expecting another, "Its at home!" but what I got, finally, was that look in her eyes that said, "Oh crap, she's caught me lying," She realized, finally, that she'd been backed into a corner of her own making. And I sent her back to her seat to hopefully, finally get her work done.
Sh e didn't get it done. She had to come the next day during her PE and art classes to finish. And the whining and fussing were amazing...she just didn't seem to get it. She'd do half the questions, and turn them in. I'd give them back to have her finish. Back and forth we went like this on all her assignments, social studies and reading language arts. When she got 2 out of 20 correct on her vocabulary assignment, I then had her sit with a dictionary to look up the words she got wrong. At that point she nearly lost her mind because she didn't know how to use a dictionary because the words "don't pop up at you".
Oh good gracious.