The First Lab...My Last Nerve

We did a lab today.

I am drinking wine tonight.

Anyone wanna guess how it went?

Two years ago our district science consulting teacher had a planning meeting over the summer and it was decided that kids really take to science a lot better if we can hit them over the head with a bunch of fun labs that get them hooked in the beginning. The idea is that we hook them and then we can, hopefully, keep them hooked throughout the year.

The drawback is that they're a bunch of immature goobers at this point in the year. And I'm not so sure that labs and immature goobers is a good match.

Now, I know that our sixth grade teachers do labs. I know this because, accordingly to Mrs. Eagle who's the science department head and sees the budgets, they buy consumables (which are, we assume, consumed) and order things like owl pelletts which they supposedly disect and gross kids out in a lab situation. However, when we asked them if they've ever done labs before they all looked blankly at us and swore they'd never, ever, done a lab.

They had trouble following simple directions. They had trouble cleaning up. They had trouble keeping their voices in "lab" range (in other words not screaming). They also were the klutziest group of kids I've ever had. I've done this lab for four years (it's a density lab where you pour different liquids into a clear container and watch it form in layers which never vary their position) and I've never had a single cup of liquid (whether it be water with food coloring, corn syrup or corn oil) knocked over.

This group knocked over FIVE.

We're talking two full cups of oil, two cups of colored water and one cup of corn syrup.

All over the place.

What a mess.

ARGH.